I swear to God if I knew she had a terminal ailment I would have given her more attention, ‘oh God this suddenness, see how pale she looks, God, oh God please let this cup pass over me, please God, I promise to love and care for her, I would change my ways for the better, oh God please hear my prayers………, “

the tattoo of tears couldn’t help but cascade freely down his robust cheeks soaking his un-kept grown bears like weeds moist by the morning dew… his sorrowful downcast was like a withered shrub………,
……… God, how did this come about, you promised me your favor in marriage, I know Lord that I do not deserve this for I have strayed from your house, I have broken the sacrosanctity of marriage, “ Lord God I know, “ but God how I strayed from your abode seems like a weird dream………
Slowly my steps strayed from your paths… “ mmmmhhhhh, when I took those vows, I really meant them, I remember looking deep into her eyes as she smiled down back at me, her left hands where in mine, I filled her hands completely with mine as I slipped the bands into her finger “ in the name of the father and the son and the holy spirit” the church chorushed the loud amen, she did same, “ she looked rather angelic as I unveiled her, my lips hungered to find hers like a thirsty merchant in the desert, “ the wetness of her lips greeted the warmness of mine” softly the kiss was to the applause of our well wishers” that day seemed so unforgettable…. Mmmmmhhh but now as I looked down at her pale frame, the beauty had been sucked away by this disease, my wife was at the mercy of faith, she moved a little in her comatose sleep I could see the pains all over her face, her head was cleanly shaven…….. when I got the shocking news of her ailment, the disease had already eating deep the life in her……
I was away from home frolicking with the boys, “ God had blessed me with everything, although I wasn’t from a poor home but, I graduated quite early and only a few of us at that time had backed MD in medicine from Glassglow University in Switzerland, not that I had mine I had mine while I was pretty early, I followed suit to grab another degree in Forensic pathology one I finally progressed to being a young Professor, I lectured in North Carolina University and my wife and two kids lived in Nigeria…… my wife was a not in the medical Sciences, she studied Mass Communication and furthered her degrees to masters and PhD she lectured in the University of Benin…. I became a Professor at age 39 and that was when I had my last son… prior to that time I had already started have extra marital affair, “ my friends would rather call me a serial monogamist” I had the finance to do whatever I wanted to do and also the reputation… I was well known in the University of Benin as I had briefly lectured in the University of Benin… and that was when I met my wife… some years before our wedding, I just came back from my short sojourn from my educational tourism, that was when I met Nnedinma my wife, she was a young lecturer in the University she herself had just come back from the USA where her father had sent her for her education… it went smoothly but we had hitches along the way, firstly my wife was from Imo state, and I was from Anambra state, my parents bluntly refused that I married her because she was from Imo state Mbaise to be precise, and that people who came from there had issues with their traditional beliefs, her parents had nothing to hide, they where stunch Catholics and I was an Anglican, my parents even went further to castigate their calling “ you see all these fake people, they said they don’t want to marry they want to become priest yet they are still sleeping around with girls, they worship marry, even use graven images, like the crucifix of Jesus and that of the Virgin marry” my son do not be fooled, we Anglicans and the Catholics we don’t intermarry, it is against our beliefs” my father was a little indifferent but he would say, “ if you love her the choice is yours, my prayer is that you make the right choice, we are serving the same God”…. The madness would continue with her parents, God, those days where sickening and frustrating……… Me and Nnedinma stuck to each other, we weathered the storm together, it was love, I finally accepted to marry in the Catholic Church, my mother didn’t attend our wedding, but her parents where there………
In as much as I had my own financial freedom, Nnedinma father and mother where renowned Surgeon and General medicine practitioner in Atlanta USA, he showered her with Luxury gifts after the wedding and it seemed initially that he had much more impact in our wedding…. My Father was a Professor of Law, he was a SAN my mother was a Professor of Guidance and Counseling, they both lectured in the University of Lagos…. My mother is a force to reckon with when it comes to my family, and just shortly after our wedding she became the Minister of Education here in Nigeria……
But the my trying times where not over, “ after the birth of our first daughter Chidinma, my Wife mother Caroline Onwuka came to visit, “ like the local saying Omugwor”initially her visit would spark up my interest to know her, but to my utter disbelief, the first days was the only one that held a little bit of sanity as she had her own way of infuriating me……… My mother inlaw and my mother would later have a fall out over my infant daughter Chdinma, their own grandchild and what led to the altercation? Just a difference in the bathing pattern… my mother insisted that they massage the baby buttocks to put it in place, but her mother said that was against the tradition of her people…… spurred by this little altercation that latter ended in a quantum of verbal assault, my mother inlaw left shortly after that back to the United states…… but that was just a tip of the iceberg….. Professor Okechukwu Onwuka although a very much exposed man, was crude in his speech and had this evil spirit of discord hanging around his shoulders, to think that he was knight in the catholic church…….. My wife loved her father and so would mostly do things to favor him,…. Now this is the beginning, my father inlaw sent for my wife, she was a citizen of the United states, I initially thought issues where resolved but little did I know that the evil that he planned out was just there hibernating…. As at when my wife travelled she was Three months Pregnant, I didn’t know she was so…….. let me not go too fast, I would break down the discord that led to our separation…. The evening to her departure we had a very serious argument, my wife had been fueled by the issues that had predisposed the altercation between my mother and hers and so something led to another, my nosy mother visited, I was away as I had attended a conference of Pathologist in Johanesburg in South Africa, I only got a call from my wife I heard her crying then my mothers voice at the background…… when I got back I met my wife sad and she had a red blotch on her left eye, my wife was light skinned and very beautiful, I demanded to know what happened… I latter got to know that my mum slapped her, this was a build up from the verbal assault my wife to my mother…… I was in a fix, I didn’t know whose side to take, my mother called shortly after,…… I called my wife and scolded her, “ I am highly disappointed in you” that was my undoing… the ,moment that came out of my mouth my wife flared up…. “ how dare you say i am a disappointment, your mother that lacks no etiquette came into my own matrimonial home and abuses me and all his chicken hearted son who is suppose to be my husband can say to his wife who has been physically assaulted by his crude mother can say is “ I am highly disappointed in you” no listen, Jude, listen to me, I am the one who should be disappointed in you, my father told me this would happen,….. The moment I heard the mention of her father I sparked” fuck you and your self righteous parents, what the fuck is wrong with you… she turned looked at me and said walking out “ fuck you too, stupid coward” I immediately got up, angrily and all that followed Is history…… that evening ordained me as a wife beater…. I had joined the group of men I called cowards who assault their wives….. that same knight my wife left the house…. Next day I got a call from her saying she was traveling to the US, my little daughter Chidinma who was barely 8months old left with her……
My wife was gone three months now and all I got from that space was the tongue lashing from her father and mother “ did I give you my daughter so you can practice boxing with her?” Daddy am sorry I lost it “ shut up you ungrateful boy, I gave you my daughter in all those circumstances but instead of thanks what do I get” listening to what the man said I swear to God if not that this man was my daughters father I would have giving him the insult of his life”…. I didn’t get any more calls from Nnedinma not until ten months latter……..
……. I was heavily sedated my alcohol and in the wee hours of saturday morning my mobile line buzzed…. I reluctantly picked the call and the serenade of her voice filled my ears temporarily clearing off the highness that had numbed my head…….. I just had a baby boy, Nnedinma is that you, “ Yes its me, I could hear her crying softly, “ and he looks just like you, when I look into his eyes I see you” I am sorry Jude, a lot has happened between us this past one year” I was apt listening to her, when the devil under my blanket in my bedroom spoke, honey please come to bed” my wife just suddenly stopped talking she obviously heard the voice of the nymph lying next to me completely naked with her breast sticking out like the Udara fruit (cherry) I was about to speak back in defense when next I heard was the click of the line it had gone dead…… That evening I had hooked up with one of the young girls Kelvin my friend had introduced me to when we had a conference in Abuja, Trisha, she was the daughter of Senator Bello Ahmed Dantata,… Trisha Bello was a consultant with TLX telecommunication, she was 6 feet 3 inches tall, had the hips of a calabash and the curves of a coca cola bottle then she swayed like the palm tree in the beach wind… she was a sight to behold, we met at the Motion lounge in Asokoro district, that evening, Kelvin was in the midst of Kunle Coka, Fred Ajuma the Civil right activist and Marvin Marvis the Oil merchant,….. we had several shots of vodka and some many other shakes… kunle Coka did strictly spirit while Marvin Marvis was a heavy drinker he virtually drank anything…. Trisha walked into our round table with Marvin Marvis girlfriend Lerida alongside Kelvins Step sister Stephanie Mbonu, Kelvin quickly did the honors by introducing us, when the hands began to take the turns as we shook hands, as soon as Trisha hands took mine, I felt the urge inside my jean pants, mini me was excited and it seemed the feeling was mutual as I looked deep into her eyes I saw the show of interest….. we got talking and later that night had mad sex in her Lodge somewhere in Gariki, Area 2……
……………. Our sexual escapade continued as the crescendo would see Trisha visiting Benin during the weekends, and this weekend was that one Nnedinma had chosen to call…. The moment my wife cut the call, I immediately hated Trisha, I was unstable, I tried the line severally but to no avail…….. I knew I couldn’t call her father for the man had already judged me as a perfect misfit for his daughter, now I had added a cheat to my already profile of being a wife beater……..
……..Trisha knew I was married and that I had issues with my marriage, frankly speaking, when I look at Trisha she looked just like my wife, although she was taller than my wife with 3inches but had every other features like her, she was light skinned and had the same dimples as my wife Nnedinma… I had missed her so much and found pseudo her in the bossom of Trisha,… Trisha had fallen in love with me over the one year that we dated……..
So that is my history of wrong doings but the other part still continues….. I left for the US when I applied for my Post-Doctoral Fellows in Wisconsin University, that was about two years after that nights incident, I didn’t hear from my wife and I had vowed never to remarry, although much latter Trisha told me she had a Son for me, she sent me his picture this was when I had started my Post Doctoral Thesis in Wisconsin………………
I got more calls from Trisha than I did my wife, I had tried to track her, I left Wisconsin at the end of my Post Doctoral Fellow to Atlanta Georgia where I was told my wife was with her parents only to find the cold welcome from her father, although I never expected much from them, they told me my wife had relocated back to Canada, I never knew she had gone back to Nigeria and on getting back she found out I had moved, she couldn’t reach me and I couldn’t reach her, not until some four years and three months when i got a call from Kunle Coka who had stumbled on my wife somewhere in the American Embassy here in Lagos…….. he said he didn’t like the way she looked, but he didn’t say much……
I placed tabs on her and found out where she resided in Benin City, she stayed in the GRA somewhere around Second Ugbor….. but it would take me another four years to come home and meet my wife in her death bed…… Nnedinma was dying,…..
…… Gosh, driving out of the intensive care unit of the University of Benin teaching hospital, I drove straight to St Alberts Catholic Church, it has been 8 years now since I was last in the Catholic Church, I was heading there to cry my eyes and heart to the LORD…..

to be continued


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